Love shouldn’t hurt – ever

Love Shouldn't Hurt - Ever

Wednesday, 04 August 2021 09:34

Healthy Breakups
by Teresia Smith

School is back in session. New school clothes, new school supplies, new schedules. And then we have the morning rush-out-the-door drama, homework drama, extracurricular activities drama and if you have kids in upper grades, get prepared for dating and relationship drama. The high school dating scene can be tough. Navigating teen romance is not for the faint at heart and it is very important that we give our teens the tools that make dating and relationships healthy experiences.
We’ve discussed healthy teen relationships before. This week, I’d like to talk about healthy break ups. Mending a heart after a break up isn’t easy for anyone. Pretty much everyone has experienced a break up in their lifetime and if you’ve just experienced one, it may help to know you are not alone. You may be feeling sad, angry, hurt, confused, jealous, and your self-esteem may have taken a blow. Let’s examine heartbreak and some ways to move forward.

What exactly is heartbreak? Many things can cause us to feel heartbreak. Maybe it is a romantic relationship that ended before we were ready. Maybe we have feelings for someone who doesn’t feel the same way about us. Although the reasons vary, the feelings are the same. Many describe heartbreak as a feeling of heaviness, emptiness, and sadness. Sometimes well-meaning friends will tell you to just get over it. That’s not great advice and honestly, when you are experiencing it, you feel like nobody else could ever understand how you feel.

Mending your heart after a break up is hard and there’s no set timetable. There are some things you can do to help such as having a trustworthy person you can share with and talk about your feelings. A comforting friend will allow you to have a good cry and then encourage you to move forward. Also, making sure to care for yourself by making sure you are resting, eating well, sleeping, exercising and staying involved in your life. Staying busy and doing some things you enjoy such as reading a good book, going to see a movie, or even trying a new hobby will take your mind off things for a while. Remember to give yourself time and space to feel what you feel and then work to move forward. All those things help battle sadness, depression and low self-esteem.

If your sadness seems to linger too long and you don’t seem to be moving forward, reach out for help. Talking to a crisis counselor can help you sort through your feelings and encourage the healing process.
Crisis Services of North Alabama offers free and confidential services to survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence. Our trained crisis counselors may be reached in Jackson County at 256.574.5826 or at our 24/7 HELPline at 256.716.1000. You are not alone.