Written by Heather Garner Thursday, 19 January 2017 14:11
Once in our lifetime, we had to stand back and admit the truth to ourselves that life was, indeed, not a bed of roses not the one of our youthful dreams. We had to become realistic, put people in their deserved place in our lives, admit the truth to ourselves, that we were not as important as we had allowed ourselves to believe. The unbearable time had come to face the awful truth. From that day forward, after months of recuperation, we have become almost untouchable. We can stand back and take an objectionable look at the situation and compartmentalize. We have little pockets in our heart where we store things that hurt too badly to think about. We leave it there, untouched, until one of those nights sleep won’t come and a hurt finds a way to come slithering back to our unwilling consciousness. Then I pick up my controller and turn on the TV. I dare the past to try to control my future.
All this is to say I am a very strong woman today because of my past hurts and disappointments. You see, even though you couldn’t see it at the time, each hurt and disappointment makes you stronger than before, time after time until it becomes easier and easier to deal with life. In my mother’s words, “Consider the source. Many times she told me this as I was growing up and would come home from school with one hurt or another.
Until many years later, I didn’t fully appreciate that advice. Why would we let the words of that person destroy our confidence. Think about it.
Life is too short and precious to let things destroy us. Today put yourself in that silent mode. Don’t give them the pleasure of letting them know they have touched you. Don’t reply.
I have found the perfect anecdote for hurts and hang ups as well as saying thank you to our Blessed Creator by helping others. “Me” is not the important thing in this life. Dwell on “they.” Become so entrenched in helping and praying for others that you don’t have time for “Me” when there is a countless number of “They” out there that need us. Life is not about Me.
Again, it isn’t what happens to us in our lives but how we react to it. It can make us bitter and spiteful or we can walk away and go on with our lives, better than before. This is not to say we will never be caught with our guard down. This will happen to the best of us in unexpected moments making our anger flare. None of us are perfect and there are those that know which buttons to push. That is why we need to make keeping our guard up a part of our lives. For instance, someone makes a guarded nasty remark to us. Totally ignore them. They want you to retort so they can say all the other ugly things they have on their mind. Beat them at their own game and don’t answer them, look away or walk away. Leave them talking to themselves as you cannot win with a nasty person. They always have nasty remarks memorized just waiting for you. Some of those “gotcha” people are so good at their games no one would ever believe the ugliness they keep well hidden. That is okay.
No matter the hurts and hang ups you have suffered you can still have a happy and profitable life. You cannot let the past ruin your future. Let all the hurts represent building blocks. One after another they can make you stronger each time they come at you. Think of each hurt as another block bringing you closer to your Savior. He knows your hurt and will handle it for you. Trust Him to take care of your every need. That is a promise. Just have faith and believe. We believe God uses these hurts to make us stronger, strong enough to realize each time Satan sends His minions after us we can recognize it and be strong enough to ward them off. Compartmentalize.
Keep those little pockets available for each hurt and if you can’t defeat it drop it in the little box there waiting for it. Now some will call it denial and maybe that is so but if it works, let it.
As an after thought, a story goes that some people were going to bury a donkey in a well. They dropped him in the well and began shoveling dirt on him. Each time they threw in a shovel full of dirt he would stack it on top of the last one and as the pile grew taller and taller he was finally able to free himself. So, too, just as the wise donkey used that dirt to free himself instead of letting it bury him, we can free ourselves or let the bad things in life bury us.
It is our choice.